a little known fact
What a legend
free my man santa
He ain’t do a thing wrong
Chris Hardwick talks about censorship of women’s bodies and absolutely nails it.
The bleeping. The bleeping. I just. THEY ARE EXACTLY THE SAME WORDS.
Standards and Practices!
I love how fucking horrified-enraged he is about it, too.
Apropos today.
Not elegant enough to be a vampire…. . not jock enough to be a werewolf.. ..
goblin it is
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 ate 9.
Why did 7 eat 9?
Because you need 3 squared meals a day.
The police arrested 3 as well as 7, why?
Because 3 was the root of the problem.
i don’t know why this doesn’t have thousands of notes, but that is unacceptable
no other song is “this generation’s bohemian rhapsody”
bohemian rhapsody is every generation’s bohemian rhapsody
the actual real life piping hot truth tea sis
I JUST PEED MYSELF
THE AUDIO IS EXACTL HOW I READ THAT OMFG
I just died a bit
only a bit
I forgot to plug my earphones in and I played this. Needless to say I have scared many people in the library.
JFC THAT GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK I DIDN’T SEE THE WORDS UNDERNEATH AT FIRST SO I WASN’T READING ALONG, JUST LOOKING AT THE PICTURE AND NOW I’M LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY AND CLUTCHING MY HEART DEAR GOD
Alternative to the tired old wizard-with-a-sugar-daddy interpretation of the patron/warlock relationship in Dungeons & Dragons:
- Clueless boss and long-suffering employee, whose powers are basically the magical equivalent of pilfering office supplies for personal use
- Scheming master and duplicitous apprentice who are totally open about their loathing for each other and are keen to see who betrays whom first
- Bureaucratic devil and soul-peddling diabolist with a contract a mile long, each honestly believing they’re getting the better of the other
- Glowering quartermaster and loose-cannon operative, whose record for getting results just barely justifies the expense of employing them
- Indifferent parent who pays their estranged offspring’s allowance like clockwork but otherwise prefers to deal with them as little as possible
- Vast, slumbering god-monster and amoral parabiologist who knows which spots to poke with a stick to provoke particular autonomic responses
You forgot the most important





